Paris loves us. We are saved, halellujah.

A defining moment in American culture passed like a comet through the videosphere last night as Paris Hilton patiently answered probing questions from the CNN bologna salesman Larry King. What can you say about Paris? Poised, repetent, she rehearsed her lines well. I believed her.  Did Mike Sitrick media train her?

Sing glory halellujah, Paris will be burned in our social consciousness forever, at least as long as I am alive. Her latest positioning is for the long-term. She will go to a poor African country we never heard of and start adopting babies. To spare the innocent, she will volunteer to walk across fields where there are suspected landmines. She will reduce her carbon footprint by wearing heels instead of pumps. She will buy a time share in Darfur.

It is admirable that Paris wants to jettison the ‘bad’ people in her life and maintain her core of purity, chastity, and nobility. I believe that she believes that she has been transformed and that partying and drugs were never part of her life. The sphere of her world extends about six inches beyond her personal space, she is a master illusionist. She is beginning to channel Madonna – reinventing youself is as simple as issuing a press statement and appearing on a talk show. We no longer have Party Girl. We now have Power Woman.  That’s entertainment. That’s PR.

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